Some days you're the peacock, other days the feather duster.īe careful around some people, and count your fingers after you're done shaking hands with them. You can't make chicken salad with chicken feathers. Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut. You can't tell the size of a turnip by looking at the top. There are also some sayings reminiscent of the wisdom of Aesop, though presented with twang.
Or basketball, and if you threw yourself at the ground you'd miss?
Perhaps you play baseball like me, and couldn't hit a bull in the butt with a bass fiddle? Then there are ugly people who whose mama's took them everywhere they went just so they wouldn't have to kiss them goodbye. You don't want to end up lookin' like 10 pounds of potatoes in a 5 pound sack. If brains were leather, some people wouldn't have enough to saddle a june bug, and couldn't pour rain water out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel.Īs far as clothes go, just because they make it don't mean it's for you. Some people are as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle, or sorry as a two dollar watch. There are some questionable compliments (Prettier than a pat of butter meltin' on a short stack?Ī lazy man will never drown in his own sweat, and often earn the nickname of Blister cause he don't show up until the work is done. It also had a ton that I'd never heard before, as well as a few that that were too corny, even for me. This contains a lot of sayings I actually use myself, or variations on them, though I reckon it'd be a novelty for anyone who didn't spend a lot of time in some rural settings. I'm glad I did, but I hope she doesn't mind reading a book that someone has already looked at. I got this for my mother for Christmas (nobody tell her), and decided to read it before wrapping it up. * Surprises -Sometimes you get so surprised by life there ain't nothin' else to say but, 'Butter my butt and call me a biscuit.'" * Revenge -Two wrongs don't make a right, but they sure do make it even. * Teenage Boys -You kinda wish they used their heads for somethin' besides hat racks.
#WELL BUTTER MY BUTT AND CALL ME A BISCUIT BOOK FULL#
* Ego -Some people are so full of themselves, you'd like to buy 'em for what they're worth and sell 'em for what they think they're worth. * Congress -Gettin' a politician to do somethin' good for our country is like tryin' to poke a cat out from under the porch with a rope. * Admitting You're Wrong -The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm, 'cause the colder it gets the harder it is to swallow. In Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit, Author Allan Zullo offers up more than 200 vernacular verses presented in themes, such These parlances might not fit the modern hoity toity rhetoric you're used to seeing in print or hearing on TV, and that's exactly why they're more refreshing than an ice cube in July. They're called colloquialisms, idioms, of just good old fashioned, home-grown country sayings steeped in humor and home-spun common sense.
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